En route

Waiting for the 747 to prep, and Frankfurt has free wifi (tut-tut, Istanbul).

Thank you for your prayers!
Papa and Ana

Open your mouth wide and I will fill it

We are in the air en route to Frankfurt via Lufthansa. The Germans are so kind yet officious.

Ana has eaten a bit of baby food (2/3 of a jar, 80kcal) and some fruit goop and Humana Folgemilch (probaby 30-40kcal). We have been up since 4am after a late night of two big diapers and what I thinl was attention-seeking crying.

But I am thinking about how Ana eats. She makes hungry tooth and tongue noises to tell you (she is still making them after our recent snack - sorry girl, there are some realities of air travel to contend with - only one Squish Delish pouch on a short haul). And she loves to eat. She has affectionate smiles for Papa and Mama, but she has this great big dopamine-dump smile while eating. She likes to let food sit in her mouth and on her lips. I believe she would be thrilled to wallow in a tub of sweet goopy food.  There are reasons for this, to be sure. Being deliberately kept near starvation for ten years and then for two more years just fed orphanage food on the orphanage schedule (in July I was told I was "spoiling her" by taking so much time over lunch - forty minutes, perhaps?) is bound to warp your view of food. And as a grown man who is mostly functional (check with Mama to be sure) it is easy to look at that simple food idolatry and be somewhat repulsed. I mean, eww. It's baby food smeared all over, girl, nothing to bliss out over.

But then I thought of that verse: "Open your mouth wide and I will fill it". God delights in giving simple blessings to his children, presenting the very image of a father feeding his small children and telling them to "open up!" (or as Ana knows, zoom-zoom-zoom-knock-knock).

And then what are we to do? What pleases our Father?

We swallow. We thank God for his blessings and then use them as he wants us to use them. If we bliss out over the blessings, if we focus on them and not the God who gives them to be used, we make an idol. And God will frown and wipe that idol out and encourage us again to take what he gives the way he gives it and be thankful.

And how gross must I look when I smear job or house or hobbies or even family and church work all over my face and grin. Let us use the gift and thank the Giver.

In Christ from 10km up,
Papa and Ana

Back so soon

Well, a very healthy late-night diaper has done in a pair of jammies for now. So Ana is dressed for travel, all set to go because Papa did not care to unpack and repack the suitcase at 11:30pm. The spare clothes in my valise remain at the ready.

But the encouraging thing that is worth sharing is how thrilled Ana was to have me change her in the middle of the night.  Makes me wonder how many times in her life that has happened.

Lights out,
Papa and Ana

The Sights

I will miss Ana's country. The first photo is a tetraevangelion, I forget the date, but at least 800years old.  We went and saw a church that grew out of a Roman-era site (the site goes back to the early Roman occupation, the church is Constantine-era). It is small, the nave is maybe 3 or 4m wide, the apse is circular, perhaps 12m diameter, and the narthex is partially enclosed, of a later date, and is rectangular. It is now surrounded by a government building housing (among other things) the ministry of science and education and a casino (which is not, to my knowledge, a government ministry).

The museum of archaeology is fascinating. The collection spans neolithic artifacts on down, with much space given to the Thracian culture, the Romans, Byzantines, and the local kings, some of whom were highly cultured and, at times, very powerful. Ana liked going bump-bump up and down the stairs, and some of the artifacts might have interested her, it is hard to say.

I was thinking about the pagan minds that made the art and cult objects, many of which are extremely beautiful and well-done. Mostly they focus on the gods; whether those be employed as objects of worship or ornament is a separate question. But you have Herakles, (demi-)god of strength, Apollo in war, Heros in hunting (god or man, not sure), Athena for wisdom, Eros and Aphrodite for love, Adonis for beauty, Zeus for command and power, and the list goes on. There is a simplicity of a sort here - strength is this strong god guy, you want strength, you pray to him. Same deal for love, wisdom, victory, what-have-you. And then the pagan culture is swallowed whole as though the earth opened up beneath it, and these pagan art and cult objects are replaced wholesale by Christian art and cult objects. There is even a scholarly argument that St. George and the dragon was a Christianization of Heros (or the Thracian horseman, if those are differentiable), and the likeness there is striking (this comment based on personal inspection of the artifacts today).

But the gods are gone.

In their place is this absurd figure who is claimed by these Christians to actually BE strength, wisdom, power, and even love and beauty. Where the pagans simply made an image of what they thought godlike strength was (and Herakles, while strong-looking, could also be called tubby), Christians pointed to this dying God and claimed that yes, here are all these things most truly found, and here alone.

The earth did open. Paganism is swallowed by death because this Jesus has himself swallowed death. No Orpheus negotiating his bride's release he, no, he who spoke the world out of nothing, who was born humbly of a virgin, who died on the cross, who walked out of a tomb afterwards to ascend to his Father's right hand - this Jesus who is called Christ - he commands the grave to give up his bride and leads her triumphantly from darkness into light. He may look at her. She may, nay must, gaze on him, for he is no Cupid to leave her - besides, she has broken many of his kind commands, but he forgives her in her repentance.

Paganism couldn't handle this.

We had such a nice walk that we were out for about two hours. When we got back we talked to Mama and Co., then Ana ate and Papa ate. Dinner was about 170kcal, putting us at about 480kcal today, which is satisfactory. Diaper output is pretty regular, with smaller #2 being directly correlated to the composition of her food (the potato+spinach food was noticeable, the banana+mango not so much).

We said goodbye to our American friends at the hotel, had a washcloth bath for Ana (which she really liked), a shower and shave for Papa (always makes security people happier if you smell nice), and are settling in for a short sleep. Up at 0400 and back to the USofA by 2100! Not bad until you add in the nine hours of time lag. Still, o ly thirty hours of travel to go between eastern Europe and the western US is pretty amazing, by any standard that considers human history.

Thank you again for your prayers! You may not hear from us for a little while, as there will be lots to do back home, but check back - when we have time, we will be delighted to give praise for God's continued work in Ana and in our family.

In Christ, who is our victory,
Papa and Ana

Calm

Thank you all for your prayers, we need them much over the next 48 hours. Ana had a pretty good breakfast (120kcal or so), eaten in our room so she did not get upset by the breakfast rush in the restaurant. Then we went down so Papa could eat, because a hungry Papa and an impish Ana made for a somewhat more frustrated Papa than he should have been.  After Papa's moderate-to-enormous breakfast in a dead-empty dining room, we were joined by the other American family at Hotel B-. We talked about church, selling houses (and not selling them), and laughed that we both knew the not-joke: "How do you make God laugh? Tell Him your plans."

This family just finished their embassy visit, so please pray for speedy visa issuance for them (and us!).

Papa has been packing things up (and almost certainly overthinking the whole thing). Diapers? Eight o' dem (and Ana uses 4-6 per day so far, and seems to have a pretty functional GI, praise God! ). Food? Something like 500kcal of ready-to-go stuff, with additional dry food (and the reasonable expectation of juice available on the planes, at least trans-Atlantic). Wipes? Wet and dry. Plastic bags? Mhm. Spare clothes? Yep. Water bottles (refillable after security)? Da. Bible, notebook, CS Lewis and Josef Pieper? Check and mate. And probably some of Papa's toiletries or whatever, I don't expect I will be the limiting factor. But we will go buy some cashews, nonetheless.

I don't think I have posted about Ana's teeth. She had the usual awful-institutional mouth. Out of curiosity, I used my spare Turkish Airlines toothbrush and water to very gently swipe her teeth, gum-towards-tooth, mostly on the fronts. She loved it. She has so little of her body free for her to enjoy, but her mouth works (which also means she revels in food - more on that another time). So we went to DM and bought a super-soft small-head pink toothbrush, and I have been doing warm water and a gentle brush after meals. Did I mention that she loves it? I say "scrub-a-dub-dub" and she smiles and opens her mouth and I get a few swipes here and there. Poco a poco her teeth have improved. The orange crud is almost all gone. There is much less visible plaque. Her breath is not daisy-sweet yet, but progress is being made.  So I am very thankful.

Lunch today was a healthy 200ish kcal, and I am learning (slowly) how to help sidestep silly behavior without discouraging her from eating.  But we should take our afternoon walk now, to see the last sights of S- and enjoy the fresh air and very comfortable weather before the visa is dropped off to us between 4-5pm. And we should get the cashews.

Thank you for praying us home! God is amazing, He is a shield about us, our glory, and the lifter of our heads.

In Christ,
Papa and Ana

Various praises

All went very smoothly, praise God. TB check took about thirty seconds, embassy visit was longer, but most of that was security. Another family was at the embassy also, and they live approximately eight miles away from us. It's a small world. We swapped contact info, and hope to get to know them once we are back home. Their little girl was also from an orphanage, but it seemed like she was from a better orphanage than P-, so praise God for that.

The airport people were quick, and the carseat is now in hand, praise God.  We said good-bye to our translator and driver, D-, and took a walk down to the store for a bit more food. Thus provisioned for the flights home, we are settled into the hotel for the night. Mama, Took, and Porgies seemed well when we spoke, and we are praying that folks are healthy for when Ana and Papa return. We are also praying that the embassy processes everything smoothly so Ana can get her visa on her passport, and get everything back to us by the end of tomorrow so we can make our flight at 0700 on Saturday.

Thanks be to our God and Savior Jesus Christ, who leads us in triumphal procession.  I was thinking about that comment of Paul's, and the Roman triumph is the image in view, where the victor paraded at the head of a column of captives, often with the opposing king/chieftain degraded and mocked somewhere in the van. (Avoiding this, by the way, is why Mithridates killed himself/asked death [depending on whose history you read] rather than be taken captive by the Romans.)  So Christ parades as his own those former captives of Satan, now brought to his city under his dominion. But praise God that he has abased Satan and lifted up our heads!

Thank you for your prayers,
Papa and Ana

Consulate day!

Ana had about 160kcal for breakfast, comprising a jar of baby food and a pouch of juice+water+fruit puree. She is interested in eating, can suck food off of the spoon without full spoon insertion into her mouth (this is newly observed today), and is extremely conscious of signals (don't wipe with a napkin - that signals mealtime is over, and she gets upset if she is still hungry).  Keeping the food in sight makes her less worried. She signals satiety with an increasing grin density and decreasing eating rate. 

I'm trying to do substantial-ish food first, then a mostly-liquid-and-fruit thing for hydration. She made the first thing I would call a stool last night/early this morning, so that is excellent (and probably a result of the baby food). She had a good wet diaper an hour after breakfast, and her saliva seems to be normal.  (I have never been more observant of bodily functions, and never more thankful when I change diapers; if you are wondering why they are so much written about, it is because they are immediate answers to prayer and matters of thanksgiving.)

Today we go to: clinic, consulate, and airport. Ana's TB prick looks normal to me (judging by WebMD), so we pray that will be a speedy and easy visit. A US dignitary is visiting S- today, so please pray that does not affect business at the consulate. I hope the airport lost-and-found is easy to deal with, but I do have my claim check, so I hope it's quick.  This all happens over Ana's lunchtime, so please pray that we would either be able to find time to eat while out, or that she would tough it through to the return to our hotel. My valise is loaded with food, diapers, spare clothes, and documents, so I trust we will be ready for any exigencies.

Thank you all for your prayers. We are one day closer to coming home, Lord willing!

Also, for any of the families who have been in a similar situation, did your child receive the vaccine Nimenrix? If so, were there immediate negative consequences to appetite or of nausea? I am so thankful that Ana seems to have ridden that through, but I can't help wondering about Brandi (or even Katie, though her starting point was much worse).

In Christ,
Papa and Ana

PS- Rev.21:1-7 in Ana's language still brings me to thankful tears, and remains my favorite passage.